*Disclosure*
*If you never watched the show, The Avatar, feel free to ignore this post as you might be confused or don't care about the subject of the following rant.Avatar: The Last Airbender the Movie
I Love the series of the Avatar. It's a great show. Yes I realize that it's a cartoon and it's on Nick and I'm 21 but it is just dang good comedy. So Heidi told me yesterday that they were making a movie & I got so friggin excited.
Okay, now- let me tell you why I am soooo friggin angry with the makers of this movie.
Reasons I Hate This Movie
#1. I liked most of M. Night Shyamalans movie- until The Happening- that is. That movie was just plain crap. Now he's the director of the Avatar- and it upsets me.
#2. The casting SUCKS!! None of the actors make me think- "Oh, they would be that character really well." They make me ANGRY!!!
At the top, we have the crummy actors playing the characters in the movie. The middle is the character in the show and to the bottom is the actor that provides the voice for the characters.
First off- we have Aang- the Avatar. I really don't have that big of a problem with this kid. Except I don't believe his arrow is big or blue enough... But that's not really his fault. (See Reasons I hate this movie #1)
Second comes my FAVORITE character in the show, Sokka, the Boom-a-rang-thrower...-bender.... He UNFORTUNATLY is being played by the CRAPPIEST person imaginable. Jackson Rathbone. The really really ugly and annoying guy in Twilight. I've been saying for the last year how stupid the casting directors were for casting him as Jasper. Jasper is supposed to be beautiful and he is not. Now these Dumb A**** cast him as the best character in this movie?! Jack DeSena- the dude that does the voice was on All That and he was HILARIOUS! He brings something... special to Sokka. I think they should have gotten him to do the part...
Third we have Katara, the Waterbender. This chick- I am not happy with her. I think Mae Whitman (voice) would be a better her as well.
Fourth we have Prince Zuko... The Firebender and The "Bad guy" who only wants daddy to love him. Does this look like a guy who throws fire at you? No. It looks like a dork. A big dorky- DORK! But I believe Rufio (voice) would through fire at you... Don't you agree? Dude- what's even lamer is that they originally wanted Jesse McCartney to play Zuko. LAME!!
Finally, we have Uncle Iroh- Also a Firebender. He is easily my second favorite character. Now, when I think Uncle Iroh, I think a bald-on-top, round, short, tea lovin' crazy guy with a thick Asian accent who rants on and on like Gary Busey saying some nonsense "Zen" phrase that he pulls out of thin air. This guy is too skinny, too tall and not Asian enough. Now, Mako (Voice) died awhile back so I don't expect him to play Iroh...
#3. What are the chances that they will have the same great humor in the movie that they bring into the show?
Prince Zuko: I want the Avatar. I want my honor, my throne. I want my father not to think I'm worthless.
Uncle Iroh: I'm sure he doesn't. Why would he banish you if he didn't care?
[Zuko walks off]
Uncle Iroh: Err, that came out wrong, didn't it?
Sokka: Aang, this is my friend Foo-Foo Cuddly-Poops. Foo-Foo Cuddly-Poops, Aang.
King Bumi: Who are you calling old? Okay, I'm old.
Katara: You can't keep us here, let us leave!
King Bumi: Lettuce leaf?!
Sokka: (holding his stomach) So where do I get something to eat?
Katara: You're one of the first outsiders to ever visit an Airbender Temple, and all you can think about is food?
Sokka: I'm just a simple guy with simple needs.
Iroh: So this is how the great commander Zhao acts in defeat... disgraceful! Even in exile my nephew is more honorable than you. Thank you again for the tea. It was delicious. (Zuko and Iroh leave)
Zuko: Did you really mean what you said, Uncle?
Iroh: Of course. I told you ginseng tea was my favorite. (Zuko half-smiles
Iroh: Zuko, remember that plant I thought might be tea?
Zuko: You didn't.
Iroh: I did. (Turns around revealing a horrible rash; Zuko jumps) And it wasn't. When the rash spreads to my throat, I will stop breathing. But look what I found. (Shows stick he was using to scratch his back; it is covered with pink berries) These are Pecurry Berries, known to cure the poison of the White Jade plant. That or Maccaory Berries that cause blindness.
(Zuko throws the berries)
Zuko: We're not taking anymore chances with these plants! We need to get help!
I guess that's all I got- but the morale of the story... Hollywood SUCKS!!!
8 comments:
Oh, yeah, this movie is going to SUCK.
Have you ever seen Shyamalan do comedy? He can't, and when he tries, he fails mightily.
Rufio from Hook? I love that guy!!! As for Shymalan movies, I hated Unbreakable. We walked out of that movie. Apparently there was only 15 minutes left of it. But as horrible as it was, Jeremy and just couldn't take it anymore. The Happening creeped me out because plants hate me already so why wouldn't they try and get me?
WHY COULDN'T THEY HAVE JUST CAST THE ORIGINAL CHARACTERS?! That is so very LAME! Bah! Why can't they ever get the characters right?! Someday i'm going to start my own movie production company and make sure all of the characters fit perfectly! Well, not really but i wish i could. Any idea who is going to play taph? Whatever!
I think the movie only represents the first season. I don't think Toph shows up until season two.
Nichelle-
Despite what most people say, I liked The Sixth Sense, The Village, Signs and Lady in the Water, but I agree with you on Unbreakable.
Some of his endings are SOOO lame. I they stick with the script from the cartoon.
Why don't they just have the people that do their voices be the characters in the movie! Whatever!
NO TOPH! TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE!
She represented 50% of Avatar's comedy duo. Without her, there's only half the funny.
I'll bet the movie ends up coming with a Shyamalan gotcha ending, too.
I would have been happier with someone else directing. Gore Verbinski or even Stephen Sommers would have been better choices.
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